The way women are treated has changed dramatically in my lifetime. I was born in 1956 and my memories date from about 1962. At that time, the standard gender roles were in place and women were the homemakers. It was unusual in my hometown for a woman to have a job outside the home. Of course, then came the 60s and 70s and the US female population demanded changes that have changed how we view and treat women. In NYC, I have found that women are, for the most part, treated similarly to men. Some of the niceties of the past era are gone or at least greatly diminished. You can hold a door open for a woman or pull out a chair, but you may get a strange look or told that she can do it for herself.
I spoke to Helmut about how women are treated in Paris and he tells me that women here universally will appreciate the niceties and are, to some women, expected when going out socially or romantically. He tells me that while women have advanced and are paid similarly to men (maybe 10% less), they have not lost their cultivated air of fragility. There is a lovely article in the New York Times, "How to be French" by Pamela Druckerman about this. I have seen this and believe this may be the norm here.
So, that's easy. I need to start paying attention to these things. Men walk closest to the street, hold the door, pull out the chair, let women off the elevator first. I think of it as keeping them "protected."
Maybe.
Then, I spoke with our friend Laure. She says that while it is appreciated, some other aspects of the male/female relationship are not. She feels that women are paid significantly less than men. Any services that serve both men and women, the women's services are more expensive. If women have short hair, their haircuts are still significantly more money than men's. Deodorant in the grocery store? Women's is more costly than men's.
I cannot say if the protective behavior goes hand-in-hand with the lower pay, but maybe it does. It seems that in NYC, where many of the niceties are vanishing, women may get a better deal (I think men do too). Maybe being protected comes at a price. Maybe you can't have both. Maybe you can.
Maybe.
I spoke to Helmut about how women are treated in Paris and he tells me that women here universally will appreciate the niceties and are, to some women, expected when going out socially or romantically. He tells me that while women have advanced and are paid similarly to men (maybe 10% less), they have not lost their cultivated air of fragility. There is a lovely article in the New York Times, "How to be French" by Pamela Druckerman about this. I have seen this and believe this may be the norm here.
So, that's easy. I need to start paying attention to these things. Men walk closest to the street, hold the door, pull out the chair, let women off the elevator first. I think of it as keeping them "protected."
Maybe.
Then, I spoke with our friend Laure. She says that while it is appreciated, some other aspects of the male/female relationship are not. She feels that women are paid significantly less than men. Any services that serve both men and women, the women's services are more expensive. If women have short hair, their haircuts are still significantly more money than men's. Deodorant in the grocery store? Women's is more costly than men's.
I cannot say if the protective behavior goes hand-in-hand with the lower pay, but maybe it does. It seems that in NYC, where many of the niceties are vanishing, women may get a better deal (I think men do too). Maybe being protected comes at a price. Maybe you can't have both. Maybe you can.
Maybe.
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