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Background

So, how did this happen? Let's just say that 2013 was a bitch of a year. Before this, I had a good job, a good relationship of 15 years, friends, an amazing apartment (1400 sq ft on the upper west side of Manhattan), three loving cats. A very nice, comfortable life.

Then the year starts. I got pneumonia, then cancer (6 weeks of radiation and chemo: a bitch, but I am fine now), lost my job, my mother and my relationship. Friends I had for 15 years "sided" with my ex (really? how old are we?) and they are gone. It all seemed to happen at once. I thought of it like a cleansing bonfire. At every step, I thought, "OK, what next?" and let it all happen. At the end, the only thing left was my apartment.

Then, in May of this year, my friend, Paul G., called me and told me he was doing an apartment exchange in Paris (one of my favorite cities in the world) and he invited me to come along. I jumped at the chance. Why not? 6 weeks in a city I love, in a great season (springtime in Paris! hello?). I had no job, my ex had taken the 3 cats.

The first week was great. Weather good, Paul and I got along (for the most part) and we began seeing the sights. Paul is a "list" guy and we were checking off the points. One night we went to a gay club and had a good time. The next night, Paul wanted to go back. I was against it: lightning doesn't strike twice. But I went along. This time, I met a guy, Helmut, who was affectionate and sexy. He wanted me to come home with him, but at that point Paul's family (brother, sister-in-law and 16-year-old daughter thereof) were staying with us. Paul and I thought it would be odd for me to disappear. We exchanged phone numbers and decided to meet one evening 2 days later.

For the rest of the vacation, I spent days with Paul and evenings with Helmut. Unbelievably sexy man who was into me.... I love this place. Helmut introduced me to the insider's Paris and I was hooked. Wonderful restaurants, sights, his friends. It was a dream time. The whole time, I was attempting to use my French.

It got to be the end of my time and Helmut asked me to stay a bit longer (twist my arm). BUT the airlines weren't having it: it was too close to my departure and it would have cost me about $4,000 to change the ticket. Helmut then invited me to a professional event in the south of France in Arles, six weeks later. So, by moving my return ticket to the return of THAT trip, I could buy a round-trip ticket from Paris to NYC and back again to fill in the missing pieces. The rest of the trip (an additional week) was pure heaven.

So, back to NYC for the 6-week wait until I got back to France. But Helmut had another idea. Two weeks later, he came to NYC for a visit. I got to return the favor and show him NYC. We missed each other dreadfully and had a very exciting visit. When he left, I had 2 weeks to wait until I got back to France for the Arles trip.

Arles is a lovely city in the south of France and we spent a lovely 10 days there and some time in Paris. Again, we bonded very closely and decided that we wanted to spend more time together. Helmut would come to NYC for another visit in September (6-8 weeks later). But, you know, I really wanted to study French... so I hopped on a plane and was back in Paris the beginning of August for 6 weeks of study at the Alliance Française. Again, we were just 2 weeks apart and it felt like an eternity.

So, back to NYC to settle things and get ready to move. I figured about the beginning of October for the move (am I really doing this?). Two weeks later, Helmut arrived in NYC for a visit. We both realized this was happening and then beginning of October... In Paris for the long haul. I have sublet an apartment near Helmut (a friend of his lives in Milan and comes to Paris maybe once a month).

So, I have the apartment, still have some money coming in, I have about $100K in liquid savings to tap into and I can begin taking retirement money in a year. My job will be to find work. So, here I am... a New Yorker in Paris. Let's see what happens.


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